Twenty-Five Life Lessons

The following list of “life lessons” escaped from me while I sat down to write today. They came spontaneously–I’m not sure I’d have written the same list if I’d tried to think about the matter “properly” and analytically–but I don’t think they’re half-bad, so I hope you’ll enjoy them. Please note that while I may agree with what’s stated here, I’m very far from implementing these suggestions in my own life. I guess there’s a rather large chasm sometimes between my ideals and the reality of how I’m actually living, acting, thinking. But ideals are useful and necessary, so without further delay, a handful of life lessons for you:

  1. Be careful not to think too much about things that are beyond your control. When you meddle, you make things hard on yourself and keep progress from happening.
  2. Be attentive to the inner voice. Everyone has one. It’s the voice of God dwelling in you and it contains all truth. This is one of the most essential habits you can cultivate—listening to your inner voice and accepting it as much as you can.
  3. Don’t buy into the story that you’re a victim to your circumstances. In fact, you are a free human being, and this freedom is the gift that makes you noble and gives you life. Choose freedom over fear as often as you can.
  4. Be a happy person by simplifying your life. Simplicity is one of the most essential elements of a good life. Simplicity in dress, simplicity in food, simplicity in habits, simplicity in mind, simplicity in heart, simplicity in faith. Don’t confuse “simple” with “simplistic”—the latter is cheap and ignorant, the former is beautiful and profound.
  5. If you want to know what your purpose in life is, then ask yourself: How can I love the most? What thing, what occupation, what habit of being will draw the most love out of my soul? If you move in the direction of love, you will find your way and end up where you’re supposed to be.
  6. Enjoy the sun. It makes you happy and warm and healthy and well. Don’t spend too much time inside, closeted away in front of a screen. It is good for the body to move and take fresh air on a regular basis.
  7. Don’t be too hard on yourself. It is much better to be gentle and kind with yourself, as your body and your soul respond more favorably when treated with love. A habit of gentleness within becomes a habit of gentleness without, and it’s easier to treat others with kindness when you’ve been practicing on yourself each day. Remember, it takes strength to be gentle and kind.
  8. Read as much as you can. Read on the bus, while you walk, at breakfast, in bed, whenever you can catch a free moment of time. Don’t ignore others in your company if it’s impolite, but do sneak in as much reading as you can. Carry a book wherever you go—it keeps the boredom at bay. Also, be discerning in what you read. No sense in wasting valuable time on poorly written books. Remember, we grow by keeping company with the greats, not by fishing in the pond of mediocrity.
  9. It’s hard to let go, but if you remember that letting go is an act of freedom, and not an act of violence toward love, then you’ll be better positioned to move on. Let yourself be light, rather than encumbered by the habits and emotions that weigh you down. You can honor these experiences without clinging to them. Indeed, God wishes for you to be free, and love does not engender servitude, self-fracture, and distress.
  10. Being at odds with God is only going to keep you in despair. The longer you resist, the more turbulent your soul will be. Much better to accept the truth that God loves you in the best, most beautiful way—and have all else follow from this. No use being at war with a God who only wants good for you.
  11. If you think you’re imperfect—you are. But don’t spend too much time worrying over this fact of life. We’re all going to fall short in multiple ways—even the saints—and fretting over our imperfections takes up time and energy that could be put to better use.
  12. Love your parents and your family, for they are the very foundation of your being and the people closest to your heart and most responsible for your existence in this world.
  13. If you think you’d rather be someone else, think again. For you were made in precisely the right configuration for a purpose that’s yours and no one else’s. Compare and despair; the trick to finding peace is to accept yourself as you are—because that’s when you’re at your most beautiful and compelling and free.
  14. It’s not enough to wish for a happy ending; you must put your convictions to the test and stand behind them with every activity of your life. Don’t be wishy-washy in your beliefs; it’s OK (and even good) to have some uncertainties, but when you trust, trust as fully and whole-heartedly as you can. This is how miracles occur.
  15. Promote peace in the world by being an instrument of peace in your own soul. Develop peaceful habits—in the way you interact with the environment, in the thoughts you choose, in the way you deal with people and animals—and you will become a clean, pure instrument of grace.
  16. Pray every day. Don’t skip, but if you do, just begin again.
  17. Spend time alone, even if you’re an extrovert. You need a bit of silence and solitude to reconnect with the source of your being and to unclutter your mind from the accumulations of a noisy, busy world.
  18. Don’t forget to eat. Nourish your body with good, simple foods. Eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full. Don’t fall into the trap of a diet mentality, or of excluding entire categories of perfectly natural food on the unfounded pretext that they’re bad for you. Simplicity is key. Your body will come into balance in its own elegant way; use your intuition to guide your choices. Not every body is meant to be a size two; when you choose in favor of excessive thinness, you’re forsaking other attractive qualities like thick hair, dewy skin, a stable mood, good energy, and the ability to function at your peak. Think twice—which sounds like the happier combination to you?
  19. Don’t be afraid of showing love and looking vulnerable. These are your strengths, and people are brightened by them. Don’t trade them in for a harsher, more sensible set of values.
  20. What’s important in your life? Think long and hard about this from time to time. Then, orient your choices to favor these things. Do away with what is irrelevant and distracting, as much as you can. This life is meant to be lived fully, and when you burden yourself with unimportant—unessential—things, you make it harder to hear the pulse of meaning in your day-to-day existence.
  21. Be bold, don’t be a victim to fear! And support the more fearful ones among us by offering us a word of encouragement and a smile of trust when we look like we’re locked inside our prisons of doubt.
  22. Establish a routine for your life. Simple, dependable routines—daily, weekly, monthly, yearly—keep us in harmony with the cycles and rhythms of nature. Don’t overcomplicate; keep your habits meaningful and essential. Make sure to touch upon all the aspects that make up a person: mind, body, heart, soul. Don’t be so dogmatic in keeping to your routines that you become stiff and inflexible; but neither be so irregular that your life becomes scattered. Chaos is inevitable in life; having established routines makes you better prepared to handle it and keep it to a minimum.
  23. Be kind, be kind, be kind. Ask forgiveness when you’re not, then try the next time to be kind again.
  24. Show mercy, that you may receive mercy; forgive, that you may be forgiven. The measure in which you give to others is the measure in which it will be poured back onto you.
  25. Childlike wonder is everything! Defend it with your life!

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