How can I begin to describe the pain of losing someone you loved?
Not only loved, but loved with the full force of your being, leaving nothing unsurrendered.
There will always be reminders of this pain – which is really a sorrow – when you touch upon the places in your heart that bring you back to that person and place and time.
Yes, there will remain places of your self that remember the sadness and difficulty of lost hopes and dreams.
And the sweetness of remembered joys will strike you, sometimes, with a sense of beauty that will never be repeated – at least not in that particular way.
There will be pain, and there will be the ache of an unfulfilled desire – but only when you allow yourself to doubt the possibility that something greater is still to come.
Certainly, there are no words that will capture the fullness and intensity and depth of your encounters with love – of your encounters with this person who was (and is) so beloved to you.
And yet, even in the darkness, there is light – a discovery which will most likely unfold only once you’ve accepted things as they are (or seem to be). And then, after a while, you’ll start to recover a semblance of joy, for it was joy that first made you love, and it will be joy that leads you, after a very long and tiring journey, back home.